


Other Side of the Tracks

by Twyd



Category: Durarara!!
Genre: Ambiguous Relationships, Angst, Canon-Typical Violence, Dark, Denial of Feelings, Fights, Fucked Up, Injury, M/M, Near Death Experiences, Possibly Unrequited Love, Slash, Unrequited Crush, Unrequited Love, Violence, Yaoi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-18
Updated: 2018-03-18
Packaged: 2019-04-04 02:37:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,040
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14010321
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Twyd/pseuds/Twyd
Summary: The night Izaya almost goes too far.





	Other Side of the Tracks

Izaya watches Shizuo from his vantage point away from the tracks, breathing hard. Shizuo has not moved. 

A train shrieks in the distance, and Shizuo still does not move. Izaya unconsciously bends into a half crouch, tense with concentration. 

His heart seems louder than the train. Shizuo is not getting up. He is not moving at all. There’s no-one around for miles. Izaya knows without taking his eyes off him that the train is coming closer, that every second is a gamble he’s usually sure he’ll win.

He leaves it until he can stand it no longer, sprints for the tracks and hauls Shizuo off by this shoulders. 

The train passes with enough force to nearly knocks him over. It screams past his ears, his hair and clothes beating him. 

He’s still catching his breath when Shizuo’s hand closes around his throat. He does this so suddenly that Izaya drops his knife. 

“You could have killed me.”

“Wrong,” Izaya chokes around the hand. “I just saved you.”

Shizuo doesn’t put him down. He doesn’t do anything but keep hold of Izaya and stare at him steadily, and it freaks Izaya out so much that he begins to goad him.

_ Do it then, monster. It was only a matter of time before you snapped, anyway. Do it, and at least you can tell yourself that it’s only Izaya, that it’s my own fault, until the next time, and the time after that… _

He stops when he realises something. Something that is suddenly very obvious, he doesn’t know how he could have missed it. Had it been there all along?

“You’re hard.”

“Shut up.”

“You’re hard, though.”

The hand tightens around his neck, making it impossible to speak.

“I can’t help it.”

Shizuo’s voice is low. Izaya wonders if he’s going to rape him. 

Shizuo puts his free hand over Izaya’s mouth to stop him responding, and Izaya bites, hard. Shizuo gives a little cry of surprise and pain and throws him. Izaya sails through the air until the back of his head hits the track. He lies there, head ringing, as Shizuo kicks him in the stomach. He keeps kicking him, so Izaya curls in a ball and waits for him to stop. 

With difficulty, he manages to roll on his back when Shizuo leaves him. He keeps reaching absently for his knife and remembering that it is behind him somewhere in the dirt. He stares at the stars above him. It had been a while since he’d been out of the city, a while since he’d seen stars.

Another train whistles, and Shizuo comes back. 

“Do that again and I’ll kill you.”

He picks Izaya up one handed by his shirt and tosses him off the tracks, and the train screams past his ears.

He smells smoke when it is gone, and for a moment is terrified that Shizuo is going to set fire to him, but he is only lighting a cigarette. He catches Izaya looking at him.

“Don’t fucking speak to me,” he says, so Izaya lets his head drop and his gaze go back to the stars. He’s not sure where he’s bleeding from, but he can feel it all over his head and part of his face, can practically smell it on himself.

He doesn’t know how long he lies there for, but at some point Shizuo comes back and slings him on to his back, making him groan with pain.

“Shut the fuck up,” Shizuo seethes. “I should leave you here to be eaten by something, you fucking little shit.”

The walk back is a long one. Izaya fully expects Shizuo to dump him on the side of the road at the first sign of civilisation, but he doesn’t. Izaya then expects him to flag a cab and pay for it with Izaya’s money, but he doesn’t do that either. 

He’s calmed down by the time they reached Shinra’s, merely dumping Izaya on the couch with a gruff explanation. 

But Shinra takes one look at Izaya and goes, “Jesus Christ Shizuo, what did you do?” and Shizuo explodes.

Izaya puts his hands over his ears on the couch while he rants.

Celty comes over and starts dabbing at him with a cloth. He thinks she’s being kind, when he realises he’s bleeding all over their couch. 

Shinra placates Shizuo as best he can, and sends him off on the balcony with Celty and a glass of milk.

Izaya avoids Shinra’s eyes when he’s gone.

“A railway track?” Shinra says to him. “What is this, the Looney Tunes?”

He doesn’t make any further conversation as he dresses Izaya’s wounds, and Izaya doesn’t either. He is depressed. Not because Shizuo beat him up - that had always been a matter of time - but over his own stupidity. Putting Shizu-chan in a situation too serious to save himself from, having to do it himself. Stupid. And Shizuo had been hard. It had thrilled him, for all of the three seconds before Shizuo decided to almost kill him. Perhaps he thought he could make the informant forget if he gave him enough head injuries. If he’d been a little faster, if he’d kept hold of his knife or Shizuo’s hand wasn’t so tight around his throat, he could have sucked him off. Out there all alone, alive and shaking with adrenalin, they could have done absolutely anything.

Izaya will pretend he has forgotten, for the time being. He will save it for a special occasion. 

He pretends to be asleep when Shizuo and Celty come back. He hears them discussing him in low voices. Then there’s movement, people moving away and someone moving closer, and Izaya can somehow tell it’s Shizuo and has to fight with all his being to stay still.

“Sorry,” he says. That’s it. 

Izaya opens his eyes, but Shizuo is already walking away. Izaya sits up in time to see the front door shut. He feels eyes on him, and turns to meet Shinra and Celty’s reprimanding looks.

“I won’t do that again,” he rasps through his damaged throat. 

And he won’t. He will stick to Ikebukuro, to getting Shizuo fired and perhaps run over somewhere central. He doesn’t know what the fuck he’d been thinking.


End file.
